Please Come to Boston

(I wrote this blog  July 8, 2013)

While I was waiting for my prescription to be filled AGAIN, at Walgreens, the song, Please Come to Boston, came on.   It brought tears to my eyes.  I used to play this song on guitar all the time. Actually, it's on right now.  I'm at Walgreens writing on my phone. It just reminds me of the good ol' days. 

It reminds me of our favorite cat, Lexie. She loved when I played guitar. She use to beg me to play guitar.  She would paw at my guitar in its stand, look towards me and "meow", basically, "Play this thing!"  Once I picked it up, she would sit next to me with her eyes closed, listening to me play.  If I stopped, she would open her eyes, look at me and, "Meow."   

She was so cute.  I have had so many cats over the years, but she was my favorite.  I loved them all, but I actually miss her. Even Susan, who is not a cat person AT ALL, loved her.  Please come to Boston was Lexie's favorite song.

The song also reminds me of the time Susan went to Boston on a business trip.  Her dad and brother flew there and met her.  I, as usual, was a tweaked out mess the entire time she was gone. While there, she waited in line for over 3 hours just to get a signature from Joel Osteen, my favorite preacher. Joel had just written a book.  Susan figured I would love that book. She was right.  I read that book to us every night before I went to sleep.  I still have it, of course.

God is amazing.  He seems to have taken care of all of my needs.  I have to say, Gods timing is good.  God also took care of Susan's needs.  This matters so much to me.  A little over a year ago, I kept praying for "God's Will" for Susan.  Everything that ended up happening blew me away, but even as it happened, I knew it was what was always supposed to happen for her.  She always wanted to be in Cincinnati to take care of her mother.  She always wanted to adopt a child because "so many children needs homes."  Her heart was always in the right place.  She used to wonder who would take care of her when she got old, since we figured I'd be dead and she would be alone. 

It's funny, because Susan does not believe in God.  I always ask her how and Angel doesn't believe in God.  God works in God's time.  He'll get to us all some how, some day.  I do have faith in this Truth.

Being at Walgreens for an hour has me craving crystal meth more than I have since I attempted suicide.   What is wrong with me?  I am an addict.  I can never use again.  I used so many times over the years.   I came to Walgreens hundreds of times right before I used.  In San Francisco, they sell syringes at Walgreens for $0.50.  Coincidently, the song on the sound system while I waited in line ALWAYS said exactly what I needed to hear.

I can't help but to have cravings right now.  It's not as if I will use - today.  Odds are, I will use - some day.  I need to beat the odds.  I always pick up where I left off.  I left off suicidal. 

Last year, before I relapsed, so many people from the program I was in were dying.  I was there for only 4 1/2 months and 6 people who were either in the program or graduated from that program died.  It was a fairly new program in which only 150 people had ever graduated. It makes me sad to think about this.  One of them who died was a really good friend.   The night after he relapsed on alcohol, he was sitting in the alley between the program I was in and Susan's home.  I walked over to see Susan and found him sitting there.  I gave him $5.00 for train fare to get home to San Jose.  I told him "Goodbye" and "Don't be a stranger."  I never saw or heard from him again.  He died a few weeks later.  I miss him.

Last year, I used to write how that if I ever used again, I would die.  I was almost right.  I never dreamed I would try to kill myself.  That way of thinking was fairly new to me.  Suicides possibility used to pop up now and then.  This time, it never let up for the entire two months I was on my run.  I could usually silence the possibility by doing another hit.  This only lasted a few hours but only made my death more eminent.  The Universe had turned on me.  Darkness would have its way this time.

The speaker just said "Walgreens - at the corner of happy and healthy".  I have to remember, that is why I am here.  To get healthy and hopefully, some day, find happiness again.  Susan filled my prescription here so many times in the past.  Back then, I would get horrible infections.  Actually, we usually got prescriptions filled at Kaiser.  She just came here to buy all the things she believed I really needed, like gauze and tape to cover my ever occurring wounds.  And, she bought me Hershey Bars.  She was and still is such an Angel to me.  I guess it's all in God's hands now.  That's not bad hands to be in!

(9/6/13)
I still love this song, Please Come to Boston.  I haven't heard it since July 8th.  I bet I'll be hearing it often now that I have my guitar at Wally World.  I'll be hearing myself play it.  I do love to play and sing this song.  I also love traveling.  Actually, I plan a trip to Denver soon - among other destinations.  Denver is the one of the tree cities mentioned in this song I have yet to "...come to..." - unless you count the airport.


United is a huge hub in San Francisco.  Denver is a big hub half way home, so....

Denver while taking off.

United Terminal in Denver - obviously!

Since I have access to photos now on my computer, I just had to put some in this blog!  I'm on my way back to my normality!  Life is getting better every day.  God really is answering my prayers.  Please try it.  Don't give up - God won't!  God just works in God's time and God's way.  Have faith, even in the tough and misunderstood times.

"Please Come To Boston"

 

Please come to Boston
For the springtime
I'm stayin' here with some friends
And they've got lots of room
You can sell your paintings on the sidewalk
By a cafe where I hope to be workin' soon
Please come to Boston
She said no, boy you come home to me

[Chorus:]
(And) She said, hey ramblin' boy
Why don't you settle down
(Boston, Denver, L.A.) ain't your kind of town
There ain't no gold
And there ain't nobody like me
I'm the number one fan
Of the man from Tennessee

Please come to Denver
To see the snowfall
We'll move up into the mountains
So far we can't be found
And throw I love you echos
Down the canyons
And then lie awake at night
Until they come back around
Please come to Denver
She said no boy you come home to me

[Repeat Chorus:]

Now that drifter's world
Goes round and round
And I doubt if it's ever gonna stop
But of all the dreams
I've lost or found
And all that I ain't got
I need somebody I can cling to
Somebody I can sing to

He said please come to L.A.
To live forever
A California life alone
Is just too hard to live
I live in a house that
Looks out over the ocean
And there's some stars
That fell from the sky
Livin' up on the hill
Please come to L.A.
I just said no
Boy, you come home to me

[Repeat Chorus]

I'm the number one fan
Of the band from Tennessee
Tennessee